Gettin' in While the Gettin's Good

Current mood: hopeful

Hey there, Blog!

I remember last week that I wasn't able to get on the computer until well after 10:00 p.m. due to my roommate's gabfest, so I thought I'd pop in early to say hi!

I don't think I told you this, but last week I had a conversation with a colleague who is having considerable trouble at work. Basically, her students taunt her, her colleagues yell at her and lie about her behind her back, and I overheard that the administration is trying to find a reason to get rid of her. This poor woman has been through hell and, from what I can see, really doesn't deserve it. She's even been out ill (probably due in no small part to the enormous stress she is under) for several weeks.

I was in a (slightly) similar situation a few years back and remember how I felt then. I would have given anything to have someone to talk to who believed me and was on my side and, above all, would tell me the truth about what was going on. So, I felt that I should be that person for her, hence our little chat.

It's hard to tell someone that it's just not working out when you're trying to be diplomatic about it. I pointed out to her how unhappy she seemed and alluded to the kinds of things that were being said about her. True, she's not completely innocent in all this. I told her months ago (when I first started hearing negative comments about her from her colleagues in her own department) that she needed to venture forth from her classroom once in a while and get to know some of the staff. She didn't take my advice and is now in an almost unsalvageable position. Even our veteran teachers (who should know better, actually) believe the negative buzz about this woman.

I also told her months ago, when she confided in me that her students were making loud and frequent anti-Semitic comments about her, that she should do something about it immediately. At the very least, I advised that she seek the guidance of our union rep...if only because he's a veteran teacher who knows lots of ins and outs and "legal ramificiations", etc. The situation has only gotten worse as time has gone on and her students are, frankly, past the point of no return. It's doubtful she'll be able to win them over with almost half the year gone. Later that afternoon, I heard one of them yelling at her in the hallway, "I hope you get fired!"

In the course of my conversation with the teacher, point by point, I made a case that perhaps she would be happier somewhere else. I honestly had the best of intentions. I even assured her that I would still help her with curriculum, be supportive, etc., no matter what she decided. But I somehow managed to put my foot in it (yet again...what else is new?) and it seems that she interpreted what I was saying to mean that I was not someone she could trust anymore. How did I manage to fuck it up so badly? Just talented, I guess.

Anyway, I found out from a colleague of mine that she had approached him today for curriculum ideas and mentioned something to effect that I WAS TRYING TO GET HER TO GO TO ANOTHER SCHOOL...as if that was just the height of rudeness (my phrase, not his). Gosh, I felt bad about that. I mean, I am trying to get her to go to another school, but only because she is so unhappy at this one! But then he also told me that he had dealt with her before and had noticed that she had a tendency to "see things differently" (his phrase, not mine) and he had learned just to steer clear of her.

This made me feel only marginally better and I sought out the counsel of our (one remaining) Life Skills teacher, whose judgment I really trust. I told her I thought I might owe this woman an apology. She suggested I write down my feelings, pros, cons, etc. Good advice!

However, before I even got to the point of writing all this down, I had a brainstorm. How could I let the teacher know that I was still willing to support her and help her without letting her know that I had heard she was implying that I wasn't supporting her? I remembered that my master teacher, many years ago, had allowed me to come back to his room one afternoon and basically pillage his file cabinets for curriculum ideas. He said I could take a copy of whatever he had more than one of. It was a very gracious gesture that I never forgot. Bingo!

Immediately after school, I went to the teacher's room. "I have an idea," I told her, and explained what I just described above. She responded enthusiastically to the idea and we made a "date" for tomorrow.

Disaster averted (or at least assuaged)? Time will tell!